Planes,Trains and Plantains!

don't quote me on that...

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Does the earth rotate on top of a spindle? No? Can you prove that it doesn't?

   Imagination, such a powerful thing isn't it? The devices of our fantasies are nothing less than extraordinary (well for most of us (although I confess that I'm losing faith in the imaginative power of our youth)) Using a double parenthetic is okay for Computer Scientists by the way...and so is punctuating statements with semi-colons; Ahem...anywho as I was saying, I am constantly amazed by people who create entire worlds and story to go along with them. I've tried, and my creations pale in comparison. Perhaps I'm not intelligent enough, or perhaps I simply lack that certain creative muse, or maybe I just haven't tried. I'm hoping its the last of the three, because otherwise I'll be depressed, not because I aspire to be a great author, it's just that...I dunno, it'd be cool if I was a good writer wouldn't it? I've been asking a lot of questions in this entry haven't I? I think I may possibly be in a contemplative mood of some sort. My heart is feeling a bit heavy and my is my soul doing? It's I'm glad no one reads this, I sound crazy in it! I haven't lost my mind though (then he finishes the sentence with the overused "I couldn't have lost something I never had in the first place!!!" or something along those lines...).

  The reason for the leakage, I think, is the fact that there are some things I'm feeling that I can't quite put in to words. Terrible right?! I actually reblogged something I found on tumblr about foreign words that have no equivalents in other languages, which leads me to the conclusion that my inability to express myself is not my fault, but due to a lack of necessary lexicographic tools within my possible lingual domain. So if how I'm feeling simply cannot be expressed in the "171,476 words in current use, and 47,156 obsolete words" of the English Language, maybe phrases of vivid imagery would work better. Too bad I'm not a poet, I know that for a fact...

   The soul leaks after some of its contents have been spilled. I try very hard to keep others dry from the murky substance within me(that sounds both suggestive and disgusting), but sometimes it can't be helped. Of course the lasting effects of soul spillage is a temporary bout of vulnerability, something I really really despise (ugh, the feel of it on my skin is downright repugnant!). Of course using the word spill implies that the divulging of the soul's contents was not entirely intended, which is usually the case when it comes to myself. Others may use words like reveal, disclose, expose or even proclaim but I'm much too secretive for anything I expose to be completely intentional.

I can't really prove that all of this is going on inside of me, just like you can't prove to me that we're not balanced on the backs of four elephants balanced on the back of a giant turtle. I suppose its all a matter of trust and belief. The reason you make yourself vulnerable is because you trust the person enough to reveal your secrets and all the crazy shit going on in your mind. I'm annoyingly obsessive, irresponsibly impulsive, incorrigibly stubborn( is that redundant?) and I jump to conclusions ( I don't have an intensifier+adjective combo for that one ( I suck));

There's a lot more going on inside my head in addition to that...Surprisingly enough I still believe I'm a pretty stable person...maybe I'm just being overly dramatic...Imagine that...


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